My Friend: Richard Lester Shimpfky 1940-2011

Column by Bishop John Shelby Spong on 30 March 2011 5 Comments
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Question

You have spoken frequently about talking to our clergy about their role in equipping us lay people for our ministries. I am a lesbian, feminist Episcopalian in a diocese whose bishop has an unspoken “Don’t ask, don’t tell” policy on gays. Given this atmosphere of fear and schism in our church, how can I help my bishop come to Jesus or should I just try harder to be a Unitarian or move to New Jersey?

Answer

Dear Kathy,

Your authentic witness will have enormous power and it should be lived out where you are. You cannot move to a place that is not natural for you and where people already agree with your witness and expect to be effective. We must fight our battles in the context in which they arise.

In my experience people have a hard time hating and rejecting someone they know. So part of your witness is to make yourself known to the leaders of the church including your bishop. Make them see you as an authentic Christian, who happens to be both a lesbian and a feminist.

I grew up quite homophobic. What changed me were people like you, who confronted me with the quality of their lives and thus forced me to redefine the stereotypes which provided the cover and the framework in which my prejudices could hide.

Homophobia is a dying phenomenon. It will ultimately go the way of racism and sexism. A new consciousness is being born. It will not be the prejudices of such homophobic people as Pat Robertson, Albert Mahler, Fred Phelps and even Benedict XVI, but of authentic people like yourself who will change the world and you will do it by transforming others by your willingness to live your life in love, integrity and honesty even while people who claim to speak in Christ’s name continue to marginalize, ignore or reject you.

Please give your bishop a chance to, as you say, “come to Jesus” by confronting him openly, honestly, lovingly and publicly. That is the way I was enabled to grow and I think there is enormous power in such a witness.

I wish you well and admire your courage.

~John Shelby Spong

 

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