From time to time, my wife and I update our papers and documentation that will be needed when we die. The standard liturgies, readings, etc. as found in the Anglican Book of Alternate Services (or the Book of Common Prayer) do not fit very well with where we are in our spiritual journey. Do you have in your library a liturgy or liturgies that would fit more closely with many of the ideas and thoughts that we have come to know and love in your books and speeches?
We want to have a funeral service that is based on contemporary biblical and theological scholarship. We do not want to listen to pious talk about everlasting life or to be told that in heaven there is a mansion with many rooms. We do not want to listen to nostalgic visions of a place where we will once again be reunited with our loved ones and friends who have gone before us. It would be of far greater meaning to us to be related in that service of the thought of Paul Tillich and to the understanding of God as the Ground of Being in whom all life is rooted.
Dear John,
Thank you for your letter. It is very unusual. Few people write with this kind of request and I regret to say that few people in the church have given much time or thought to such a request. The first prerequisite would be to have a minister who understands what you are requesting and one who is willing to work with you to create such a liturgy.
Most of the liturgies of the church reflect the historic compromises with literalism. They do not bother me as much as they seem to bother you, for I view them as a kind of poetic attempt to penetrate life’s deepest mystery. Most people need rather concrete images. The shock of loss is sometimes so intense that we grasp for images on which to cling. The Church has always been willing to provide them. I do not think, however, that funeral services are the time or place to work out new theological understandings. The beauty of your letter is that you want to work these things out in advance.
I suggest that you examine the proposed scripture readings as the first step. Many of the suggested ones come from the Fourth Gospel and they are generally understood to be literal. “I am the Resurrection and the life” for example, is from John. So is “In my father’s house are many mansions.” If John is properly understood, these are poetic words used to describe mystical oneness, but that is not what most people hear. I suggest that you look at a reading from Ecclesiastes on the meaning of life. There is also nothing to prevent you from reading a selection from Paul Tillich. I urge you to read from one of the three books of sermons and not from his Systematic Theology volumes. Tillich connected with the common mind when he preached in the chapel of Union Theological Seminary in New York City or in the chapel at Harvard Divinity School. When he wrote theology, he seems to have only his fellow academics in mind. The titles of his best known books of sermons are, The Shaking of the Foundation, The New Being and The Eternal Now.
I find that the funeral prayers that mean the most to me are prayers of thanksgiving in which we recall the things about the deceased that so deeply enriched our lives. When we are in grief, it is important to remember that grief is always an expression of the fact that something of great meaning has been taken from our lives, so there is comfort in rejoicing over the privilege each us of had had being the recipient of those gifts.
How one speaks about hope in the presence of death is not easy, but I think it can be done. I attempted to do just that when I wrote the book entitled: Eternal Life: A New Vision Beyond Religion, Beyond Theism and Beyond Heaven and Hell. It is still the best I can do. I do not believe that death is the end of life, but I do not know how to talk about that in words I have to use that are bound by both time and space. I also believe deeply in the reality of God, but I also do not know how to articulate that belief in my human vocabulary. That is why mysticism appeals to me so much. Ultimately, the mystic must abandon words and learn to worship in wordless wonder.
I suspect that many people share your concern. I invite them to share their insights with you by responding to this column. I will pass their comments on to you.
My best,
John Shelby Spong
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