Dear Barbara,

Your question poignantly articulates how so many of us are feeling right now: frightened, and rightly so.  It’s heartbreaking to see the rights of vulnerable populations stripped away.  It’s terrifying to think that so many in our country voted for an administration that clearly wants to harm those whom Jesus so passionately told us to protect.  It’s horrific to think about how quickly our democracy is slipping through our fingers as we descend ever closer to a fascist regime.  Right now, a lot of us are flailing as traditional responses like petitions, marches, legislation, and even the judicial system seem to falter.

Your inclination to connect with those who hold differing views is noble.  Relationships can absolutely change peoples’ hearts and minds.

• It’s easy to hate “illegals stealing our jobs.”  It’s harder to hate the undocumented worker who lovingly cares for your children while you work.
• It’s easy to hate the “trans person in the bathroom.”  It’s harder to hate your trans child who is living into their authentic self.
• It’s easy to hate a stranger who “murdered a baby.”  It’s harder to hate your 15-year-old niece who was sexually assaulted and had to make the hardest decision of her life to get an abortion.

Relationships complexify situations and help us to understand the multi-faceted decisions that we all face.

There is value in building and maintaining relationships with people whose views we find reprehensible, because those relationships are ultimately much more effective than rhetoric or argumentation at bringing others to the side of love and compassion.  However, this shouldn’t be done at the expense of our own physical, mental, or spiritual well-being, especially for marginalized groups who are already facing the added stressors that come from being a part of a vulnerable population.  The more privilege we have, the more responsibility we bear for taking personal risk in advocacy.  As a straight, white, cisgender male, I recognize that I have a responsibility to have hard conversations with those who disagree with me if I want to use my privilege responsibly.

Our faith teaches us that holding fast to hope, especially in times of despair, can create resiliency.  In fact, hoping, in and of itself, is an act of resistance to an administration that wants us to lose hope.  Loving is an act of resistance.  Finding joy is an act of resistance.  Practicing peace is an act of resistance.  Being generous is an act of resistance.  Living our lives when the principalities and the powers want us to shut down is an act of resistance.  We cope with hope…and we never let them take it away.

~ Rev. Dr. Caleb J. Lines