Dear Reader,
Thank you for this excellent and truly important question. Congregations that call themselves "Progressive," "Fully inclusive," "Welcoming & Affirming," and/or "Open to All of God's Children" that haven't actually done the work of becoming an open and affirming congregation that is truly welcoming, including, embracing, and celebrating of LGBTQI+ persons are doing harm both to progressive Christianity and to the Christian Church in general. If someone who is LGBTQI+ visits a congregation that bills itself as being "welcoming to all" - and may even have a rainbow flag sticker up on their door or on their website - and that congregation hasn't officially voted to be an LGBTQI-friendly and celebrating congregation is someone who is NOT entering into an actual safe place or sanctuary for them. In fact, if a congregation HAS made such a decision to be welcoming and inclusive and yet HASN'T DONE THE WORK to learn how to actually live out that decision in a meaningful way that has people actually feeling safe, then they are engaging in bait and switch and false advertising. Full stop.
Several mainline denominations have voted at their national and global forums to shed their previous homo and trans phobias over the past decades (most recently, the UMC). And yet, even though those denominations may now officially no longer be bigoted and discriminatory on paper, there is still a need for individual congregations to do the work to become reconciling ministries that are part of the Reconciling Ministries Network (or More Light; Welcoming and Affirming; etc). LGBTQ+ persons and their friends and allies need to know that if they visit an Episcopal, United Methodist, PCUSA Presbyterian, United Church of Christ, Disciples of Christ, or ELCA (etc.c) congregation it will truly be a safe and welcoming experience for them and their loved ones. That is something that can't happen overnight because of a vote at a General Conference - it requires doing the work. This involves a time of inquiry, vision-casting, and listening. It involves an intentional choice to learn about LGBTQ+ realities, looking at how the church culture is used to conduct business, and learning what might need to change to help things be more welcoming. It involves much education. It also involves a vote that demonstrates significant buy-in and ownership of the members of the congregation to become a reconciling congregation. And, once that has happened, it involves a commitment to lifelong learning to continue to learn more and improve all the more to help more people feel as safe and welcome as possible in the life of the congregation. This means learning about the importance of honoring chosen pronouns; encouraging all persons to have their pronouns on name badges; adjusting signs on restrooms - and perhaps having certain restrooms (or all of them) dedicated as "All Sex and Gender"; learning about intersex, transgender, bisexual, non-binary, and gender-fluid realities; and it means congregants seeing LGBGTQI+ persons serving in lay and clergy leadership roles.
Speaking from my United Methodist context, I predict that the number of United Methodist congregations that choose to do the work to become Reconciling congregations that are fully LGBTQ+ welcoming and inclusive will double in the next four years. This would be a really good time to donate to them because they are going to need to hire more staff to help more congregations take on this significant work.
Reconciling Ministries Network
Here's a link to resources to help your congregation to become a truly LGBTQ welcoming and affirming one.
~ Rev. Roger Wolsey
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